Changing a habit is hard. It can be easier if you have support. Discuss the habit you’d like to change and ask for your spouse’s support. Describe CLEARLY what you would like from them.
By showing them that you need them, you show that they add value to your life.
“I really want to be more patient with the kids. I will need subtle reminders when I am slipping. This is the type of help I will need…. Can you please be that support for me?” “I really want to eat healthier lunches. Do you have any ideas? …. I will also need reminders. Can I count on you to encourage me?”
It is important to ask, and not fall into the trap that if ‘s/he really cared, s/he would know how to support me’. NOTE: Don’t ask them to do something that is hard for them or takes their time or energy. (There is a way to ask for that support, but that is another discussion).