Financial arrangements. Ours. Mine. Yours.

So many of the arguments in marriage are around money. People have different values and priorities. Different ways of making financial decisions.
Most of the money goes to joint expenses – household, children, tuition, bills. But then there are some discretionary choices of where to spend some money on little luxuries or comforts.
Here is a framework of a system that may work for you; you may have to tweak it for your individual situation: “Ours. Yours. Mine.”
In this arrangement, most of the money goes to the ‘Ours’ joint account. There is transparency and discussion about the joint budget. And a pre-arranged agreement about joint decisions or ‘authorizations’ for larger or medium purchases.
Then some money (depending on income and absolute expenses) goes into the ‘His’ and ‘Hers’ accounts. No matter who is making more money, each gets some money in these accounts. This money can be spent however the spouse wants – on gifts, on small luxuries or frivolities. Each spouse has privacy, autonomy and control over their accounts – free from inquiry, advice and comments from the other.

This model might just be the solution to your money squabbles. It might be worth bringing in a financial planner to see if and how to make this work for you.

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