Gevura (sefira: week 2)

Literal definition: Strength

In other words: Restraint – Channeling – Focus – Discernment – Respect for boundaries – Discipline

• Gevurah is about setting up boundaries and standards so that our kindness, love, giving and all activities in our lives have focus and direction; this is what yields success. Through Gevurah, we give the correct healthy amount; we restrain and withhold as appropriate for the circumstance. • Beyond discipline in interpersonal relationships, Gevurah should also be expressed in our own life: self-discipline, refining our own character, calculating our own time, resources and efforts. Thereby maximizing our achievements and success.

REFLECTIONS about Gevurah in your marriage
• What are the healthy boundaries in your marriage? In what ways do you respect your spouse’s space, boundary and privacy – – morally, psychologically or emotionally? Are you consistent? Are there areas in which you can improve; has your spouse mentioned or hinted at anything? Did you ask them outright about what they wish you would change about your behavior; how did you receive that?
• Is your amount of Gevurah appropriate for a married person? Are you overbearing? Is your demeanor too strong and silencing your spouse? Are you a control freak? Do you speak with harsh words of insult, blame, demands?
• How do you express to your spouse your disagreements? Do you choose your words wisely with sensitivity; do you show respect and concern for your spouse’s dignity?
• In what ways do you have personal restraint and sacrifice for the sake of your marriage and your spouse’s happiness and dignity? In what ways do you filter out other interests in order to focus on your spouse? 💡EVEN MORE
Gevurah is also a positive mode. For example:
Using Gevurah and strength to continue giving kindness even when it’s not easy.
Giving with extra strength, with extra fervor, excitement and passion.
Doing for your marriage and family above and beyond your duty. Forcing yourself to give and do even when you are not in the mood. –

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