Weekly 3-2-1

Just about every week, Adai Ad JOT (Just One Thing) presents 3-2-1: 3 Conversation Starters, 2 Inspiration Quotes and 1 Point to Ponder.

These are sometimes related to the time of the year or what is happening in the world. Some are just wonderful on their own. 

These are always thought provoking and inspire great personal reflection and good conversation. All to enhance your relationships.

3 Conversations you might have this week

Just about every week, Adai Ad JOT shares 3 discussion starters.  These are some of the recent ones.  (We include the date to give you context of the topics.)
2020_11_291. What are some ‘snow day’ memories?
2020_11_292. What does trust mean to you? What would make you not trust someone?
2020_11_293. How does the phrase “ASAP” land on you; how do you feel when someone tells you they want something done “ASAP”?
2020_11_22 1. What is something that you didn’t have or do as a child that you want your children to have or do?
2020_11_22 2. What is a favorite Chanukah memory?
2020_11_22 3. What are things you are grateful for – in your life? in your family? in your community? in the world?
2020_11_15 1. What is the difference between hope and optimism?
2020_11_15 2. How do you like to be appreciated? What typical modes don’t work well for you?
2020_11_15 3. How do colors impact mood? Which colors work best for you?
2020_11_08 1. Where have we been ‘penny wise, pound foolish’?
2020_11_08 2. What do you consider a successful life?
2020_11_08 3. What is your idea of a relaxing winter vacation?
2020_11_01 1. What is your definition of friendship in a marriage?
2020_11_01 2. What do you consider is an important modern invention?
2020_11_01 3. What is a situation that you handled quite well, that you are proud of? What is a situation you wish you had handled differently?
2020_10_25 1. What is something that you take for granted?
2020_10_25 2. What is an adulting/housekeeping chore that you really don’t like doing?
2020_10_25 3. What do you consider success in life? What do people do to become successful in life?
2020_10_18 1. What is something we want to do differently this year?
2020_10_18 2. What can I do to help you destress?
2020_10_18 3. What are some favorite memories of fall from your childhood?
2020_09_13 1. What might you think about during the auspicious time of shofar blowing?
2020_09_13 2. What will you include in your prayers for the world this Rosh Hashanah?
2020_09_13 3. What are some details (logistics) that you would like to be clear on this Rosh Hashanah – guests, tefillah times, minhagim, children’s schedules, etc.
2020_09_06 1. What are some Rosh Hashana memories that you do (or do not) want to incorporate into your family life?
2020_09_06 2. Is it really possible for people not to change after they get married?
2020_09_06 3. What is one area you want to improve in this year. What support might you need from your spouse?
2020_08_30 1. Is it really possible for people not to change after they get married?
2020_08_30 2. When you think back on this past summer, what are some highlights?
2020_08_30 3. Which would you rather: Being embarrassed in public or embarrassing someone else in public?
2020_08_23 1. What do we spend a silly amount of money on?
2020_08_23 2. What does ‘self-care’ mean to you?
2020_08_23 3. What is a cause you would like to rally behind?
2020_08_16 1. Every relationship has its unresolvable (perpetual) issues that center on either fundamental differences in your personalities, or fundamental differences in your life style needs. What are some of your unresolvable problems?
2020_08_16 2.Do you like surprises? What does it depend on?
2020_08_16 3.What made you laugh or giggle as a kid?
2020_08_09 1. As a child, how did you and your family mark the end of the summer?
2020_08_09 2. What do you think others think of you? What gives you that impression? How does that impact you?
2020_08_09 3. Name 10 things you want in your life. Then categorize them into a. what you want to DO; b. what you want to HAVE; c. what you want to BE; d. what you want to GIVE/ contribute to the world.
2020_08_02 1. What could we do to simplify our lives? What could we subtract?
2020_08_02 2. What are some examples when your gut was right? When you followed your initial instinct? When you just knew you shouldn’t do something, yet you did it, and your initial instinct was correct?
2020_08_02 3. If you were being paid to visit a museum (ANY, in the whole world), where would you go? (There are museums for all sorts of interesting and zany areas of even remotely possible interest.)
2020_07_26 1. What is playfulness in adults?
2020_07_26 2. What makes you feel that someone is giving you full attention? What might someone be doing that makes you think that they are not giving you attention?
2020_07_26 3. What is something new local activity that you’d like to try? (You might look at Groupon for some ideas?)
2020_07_19 1. What are some of your favorite Memes about Corona times?
2020_07_19 2. What are some differences in the way you were brought up? How does that impact how you are today?
2020_07_19 3. What household chore do really hate doing? Which do you (more or less) enjoy?
2020_07_12 1. What strengths did we discover about ourselves (as individuals and as a couple) during Corona?
2020_07_12 2. Is greed always a bad thing?
2020_07_12 3. What is a favorite food that you had a child (at home, at grandparents, at camp)?
2020_07_05 1. What is your level of comfort with risk taking? How big will the payoff have to be for you to take the risk? How does the probability of success play into your decision making?
2020_07_05 2. What do you consider a ‘great’ day?
2020_07_05 3. What does happiness mean? How is it different from joy? from pleasure?
2020_06_28 1. What is the difference between constructive criticism and feedback? How do you prefer to hear about something in which you can benefit from improvement?
2020_06_28 2. What should be on our ‘we don’t do that’ list?
2020_06_28 3. What is a food or restaurant you want to try this summer?
2020_06_21 1. What is something that you wish you would have mentioned to your spouse earlier?
2020_06_21 2. What is the difference between ‘give and take’ and ‘give and receive’?
2020_06_21 3. What do you like about the neighborhood you live in?
2020_06_14 1. What is something that people would be surprised to find out about us? (What is something our kids would freak out if they knew about us?)
2020_06_14 2. What is something you wish you had learned when you were younger?
2020_06_14 3. What is your favorite part of your day?
2020_06_07 1. Life is a gift. Life is too short to …
2020_06_07 2. What is something that you just won’t tolerate in others?
2020_06_07 3. What is a crazy, zany, unconventional thing you’d like to try this summer?
2020_05_31 1. What is the difference between dreams and wishes? What are some dreams/wishes that you have?
2020_05_31 2. What are some favorite childhood memories of summer? How might we recreate those now as adults (yes, it’s OK for adults to be playful and childlike sometimes) and/or for our children?
2020_05_31 3. What is something you (would) like to do to unwind?
2020_05_24 1. What does humility mean? How is it different and the same as meekness, timidity, vulnerable, open-minded, arrogance, pride? What are benefits of humility?
2020_05_24 2. What might it have been like to go up to the Beis Hamikdash for Shavuos? What do you imagine the celebrations to be like? What challenges might families have faced?
2020_05_24 3. What do flowers and other forms of natural beauty mean to you?
2020_05_17 1. What is a summer favorite that you might miss if the Corona lockdown continues for the next few months?
2020_05_17 2. What is a character trait that you worked on and now you are much better at it?
2020_05_17 3. What is something that you observed in another family (or your family of origin) that you would like to incorporate into your family culture?
2020_05_10 1. What is something you discovered about me after we got married?
2020_05_10 2. What are some favorite childhood memories of Lag B’omer?
2020_05_10 3. What are some things you’ll miss when this corona-quarantine is over?
2020_05_03 1. What would you like a second chance at doing?
2020_05_03 2. What are some favorite childhood memories of spring?
2020_05_03 3. What are some things you’d like to do when this corona-quarantine is over?

2 Quotes to inspire you

Just about every week, Adai Ad JOT shares 2 quotes to inspire you.  These are some of the recent ones.  (We include the date to give you context of the topics.)
2020_11_291. Planning without action is futile. Action without planning is fatal.
2020_11_292. We don’t stop playing because we are got old; we get old when we stop playing.
2020_11_22 1. “It’s not happiness that brings on gratitude; it’s gratitude that brings on happiness.”
2020_11_22 2. “Change your thoughts and you change your world.”
2020_11_15 1. “Anger exposes the problem but never delivers the solution.” – Rabbi Jonathon Sacks
2020_11_15 2. “Happiness is not made by what we own. It is what we share.” – Rabbi Jonathon Sacks
2020_11_08 1. “Everything you ever wanted is on the other side of fear.” – George Addai
2020_11_08 2. “Once you will need less, you will have more.”
2020_11_01 1. “The secret at getting ahead is getting started.”
2020_11_01 2. “When you are busy working on your own grass, you don’t have time to notice or care about other people’s grass.”
2020_10_25 1. “You ought not be judging other people’s choices without understanding their context.”
2020_10_25 2. “If you don’t like the road you are walking on, start paving another one.”
2020_10_18 1. “If you truly want to change your life, you must first be willing to change your mindset.”
2020_10_18 2.  “Laughter is an instant vacation.” ― Milton Berle
2020_09_13 1. “Old ways won’t open new doors.”
2020_09_13 2. “A little progress each day adds up to big results.”
2020_09_06 1. “The way you speak to yourself matters.”
2020_09_06 2. “Knowledge is not power. Action is power; knowledge is just potential.”
2020_08_30 1. “An empty tank will take you exactly nowhere. Take the time to refuel.”
2020_08_30 2. “You don’t have to control your thoughts; you just have to keep them from controlling you.”
2020_08_23 1. “Your dark days make you strong. Or, maybe it is that you are already strong and those dark days made you prove it.”
2020_08_23 2. “Before you point fingers, make sure your hands are clean.”
2020_08_16 1. “Never regret. If it was good, it’s wonderful. If it was bad, it was an experience.”
2020_08_16 2. “Worrying is like betting against yourself.”
2020_08_09 1. “The art of being wise is knowing what to overlook.” – William James.
2020_08_09 2. “Love me when I ‘least deserve it’ because that’s when I most need it.”
2020_08_02 1. “If a decision is reversible, the biggest risk is moving too slow. If a decision is irreversible, the biggest risk is moving too fast.” – James Clear
2020_08_02 2. “Never let the opinions of others measure your self-worth.”
2020_07_26 1. “Be happy not because everything is good, but because you can see the good side of everything.”
2020_07_26 2. “We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used to create them.” – Albert Einstein
2020_07_19 1. “Failure isn’t the opposite of success. It is part of success.”
2020_07_19 2. “Listen more than you speak. You don’t learn much by hearing yourself speak.”
2020_07_12 1. “Never let success get to your head. Never let failure get to your heart.”
2020_07_12 2. “Do not listen with the intent to reply. Listen with the intent to understand.”
2020_07_05 1. “Be a good listener. Your ears will never get you in trouble.” – Frank Tyger
2020_07_05 2. “Patience is not the ability to wait but the ability to keep a good attitude while waiting.”
2020_06_28 1. “Sometimes the grass is greener on the other side because it’s fake.”
2020_06_28 2. “Worry does not create a more positive tomorrow. It simply guarantees a more negative today.”
2020_06_21 1. “Every small step in the right direction counts.”
2020_06_21 2. “Laugh at yourself first, before anyone else can.” – Elsa Maxwell
2020_06_14 1. “No one looks back on their life and remembers the nights they had plenty of sleep.”
2020_06_14 2. “Be selective in your battles. Sometimes peace is better than being right.”
2020_06_07 1. “Do one thing every day that scares you.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
2020_06_07 2. “Never put the key to your happiness in someone else’s pocket.”
2020_05_31 1. “Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.” – Winston Churchill
2020_05_31 2. “When you can laugh at yourself, you are free.”
2020_05_24 1. “Life will only change when you become more committed to your dreams than you are to your comfort zone.” – Billy Cox
2020_05_24 2. “Prideful people have all the right answers. Humble people ask the right questions—of themselves and others.”
2020_05_17 1. “Sometimes you win, sometimes you [l̶o̶s̶e̶] learn”.
2020_05_17 2. “Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass but learning to dance in the rain.”
2020_05_10 1. “May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears. Strength doesn’t come from what you can do. It comes from overcoming the things you once thought you couldn’t.”
2020_05_10 2. “The best solutions don’t come good answers to the questions presented … they come from asking new questions.” – Seth Godin
2020_05_03 1. “Life always offers you a second chance… It’s called tomorrow.” Nicholas Sparks
2020_05_03 2. “No winter last forever; spring is sure to follow.”

1 Point to Ponder

Just about every week, Adai Ad JOT shares 1 point to ponder.  These are some of the recent ones.  (We include the date to give you context of the topics.) 2020_11_15Perfection is the enemy of progress.
2020_11_29You grow through what you go through.
2020_11_22 Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it. – William Arthur Ward
2020_11_08 We don’t laugh because we’re happy, we are happy because we laugh. – William James
2020_11_01 Without rain, nothing grows.
2020_10_25 We don’t learn from experience …. We learn from reflecting on experience. – John Dewey
2020_10_18 Acceptance is seeing what is true and not resisting that it is true.
2020_09_13 Be thankful that Hashem’s answers are wiser than your prayers.
2020_09_06 When nothing goes right, go left.
2020_08_30 The right decision is the wrong decision if it’s made too late.
2020_08_23 Happiness is found when you stop comparing your life to others.
2020_08_16 If the issue can be solved with money, it is not a problem, it is an expense.
2020_08_09 Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things.
2020_08_02 Listening is the greatest form of flattery.
2020_07_26 You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one.
2020_07_19 Don’t base your decisions on the advice of those who don’t have to deal with the results.
2020_07_12 Don’t cling to a mistake just because you spent a lot of time (or money) making it.
2020_07_05 You can have anything you want, but not everything you want.
2020_06_28 If you can’t remember the last time you jumped into a puddle, it’s been too long.
2020_06_21 Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery is dead? –
2020_06_14 Change is a slow process, but quitting won’t speed it up.
2020_06_07 Excuses will always be available; not all opportunities will be.
2020_05_31 We see the world through our own lens – based on our experiences. Our perception is completely unique to us. No one ever, anywhere, will ever have the exact same perception of reality as we do because there is no two people whose lives have been exactly the same.
2020_05_24 How am I different now from last year and how does impact how I will take in the messages and lessons from Shavuos?
2020_05_17 “Never be so busy comparing what you have that you forget how fortunate you are to have it.” – James Clear
2020_05_10 Some people feel the rain, other people just get wet.
2020_05_03 We use distraction to avoid dealing with pain and unmet psychological needs. The key is that we need to be aware of our distractions. Our distractions need to be planned and moderated in bite-sized chunks. We need to know when we’re checking out. We can’t binge on distraction. — More from Nir Eyal, author of Indistractable https://www.nirandfar.com/
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