Malchus (Sefira: Week 7)

Literal Definition: Kingship

In Other Words: Leadership. Nobility. Aristocracy. Dignity. Authority, Power. Royalty.

– Malchus is about being a leader – in words, behavior and attitude – in your personal life and in everything you do.
– Living a life of actualizing goals and plans. Keeping the best interest of others as a guiding post in everything you do. Striving to bring out the best in each person. Appreciating each person’s unique abilities. Treating others with dignity and respect.
– To be a respected and effective leader, your leadership must reflect the sum total of all the other six emotions/ sefiros. In other words, before acting, make sure that your actions reflect your lovingkindness, discipline, compassion, persistence, humility and bonding (which should come as an outcome of a careful intellectual, objective decision process using your Chochma, Bina and Daas).
– A good leader has a healthy balance of self-dignity, kindness, graciousness, confidence and aristocracy.

REFLECTIONS about Malchus in your marriage
– In your marriage, what is your style of leadership? Does it come with honor, respect and best interest for the marriage and family? Are your priorities healthy for your marriage?
– In your marriage, do you impose your authority? Do you make room for your spouse? Do you help your spouse flourish? What are situations where you defer to your spouse? How often do you allow your spouse to lead? Does your spouse feel you have their best interest in mind?
– Are you a leader or a dictator? Do you treat your spouse as an equal partner?
– Do you consult with your spouse in the decision-making process and coordinate with harmony and unity? Do you speak respectfully?
Are your goals, plans and dreams of success healthy for your marriage and family?
– Does your spouse sense your leadership is based on kindness, love and humility? Do you exhibit any selfish or narcissistic tendencies? Does your spouse and family follow you because they want to or out of fear? Do others respect your authority? Why is that? What can you do to enhance your leadership style in your family life?

💡 Even More
Hashem created the world with the sefira of Malchus – through 10 statements. Through the power of speech. Words have power. Speech reveals your thoughts. Rambam teaches us to emulate Hashem. When we live our life ensuring that our speech and conduct are a reflection of Hashem then we know we are living in the image of Hashem.

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