emotions

Match your words to the Intensity of your emotions

MATCH YOUR WORDS TO THE INTENSITY OF YOUR EMOTIONS. Every emotion has degrees, from diminished to fiercely intense. Different words have different temperatures. Monitor your language and make sure your language isn’t minimizing or exaggerating the intensity of emotions. Match your words to the actual intensity of your emotions. –> Are you feeling blue, stressed, […]

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“I’m Not Feeling It”: How to build Connection

One of the key reasons people struggle with dating is: bonding, or building a connection. If connection doesn’t develop automatically and organically, it is still possible and necessary to nurture it. How? By saying and doing those things that trigger the same kinds of reactions that for most people happen naturally. Make it your business to ensure that your date feels better about herself for having spent some time in your company. This is especially true for people who are struggling to build connection.

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“I’m Not Feeling It”: How to build Connection

One of the key reasons people struggle with dating is: bonding, or building a connection. If connection doesn’t develop automatically and organically, it is still possible and necessary to nurture it. How? By saying and doing those things that trigger the same kinds of reactions that for most people happen naturally. Make it your business to ensure that your date feels better about herself for having spent some time in your company. This is especially true for people who are struggling to build connection.

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Don’t react, respond.

Responding, while technically a reaction, takes into consideration the desired outcome of the interaction. Reacting is emotional, responding is emotional intelligence. Reactions are driven by the beliefs, biases, and prejudices of the unconscious mind; they are done without ‘thinking’. When you react to life, you’re acting emotionally from either memory or old habits. Responding means

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Use “I statements”. Avoid “You statements” of blame and accusation

BASIC I STATEMENT: I feel ___ when ____ ex: I feel worried when I think that you’ll be home for dinner and you aren’t here for hours and I don’t hear from you. – I FEEL Avoid words that may seem like emotions, but really imply the action of your partner: “I feel…ignored, annoyed, mistreated,

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