Words to Avoid: “If only…”

“If only [something was different in life], I’d be happy.” That is a defeatist, negative attitude.

In reality, our circumstances and even genes are less consequential than our attitude. And that is good news. Because unlike our circumstances or our genes—over which we have little or no control—we can control our attitude.

Attitude is a choice. Many people mistakenly think that if their circumstances were different, they would have a better attitude. But that’s not true. Attitudes are not determined by circumstances; attitudes are determined by choice. In any situation, we can choose to have either a good or a bad attitude.

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