You need alone time to recharge

We all have different needs, one of the most common being space. You can both love someone and need space from them. Especially these crazy Corona days.

BE APART TOGETHER. Build ‘alone time’ into your daily routine. When we are not intentional about taking space when we need it, we risk being hurt when one asks for that much needed space. Remember to also schedule connection time.

Accept that you and your spouse might need space at different times. And that you might have very different ideas of what to do during that time. You might take a walk, read, watch something, work out, talk with friends, work on a hobby, whatever works for you. Space can even mean sitting side by side, but focusing on your own individual activity (noise blocking headphones can be helpful).

If you notice that you need some space outside the pre-designated times (ie: you are noticing irritability, fear, tension, or tiredness), respectfully and gently ask for space/time for yourself. “I am feeling tense now, I think it is best for all of us if I take a 30 minute alone time now.” Don’t just blurt out “I need my space!”.

Enjoy the time and space apart, whatever it may look like, and don’t feel guilty. But just make sure it isn’t too much space, and that you do spend time connecting.

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