Every couple has disagreements or fights – sometimes. If you did have a fight and then found a way to smooth things over without truly feeling a deeper sense of understanding about yourself, your relationship and your spouse, you’ve wasted a perfect opportunity for growth.

Reflect about what might really have been going on for you – triggers, mood, timing, etc.

Try to see the situation from your spouse’s perspective. What might be going on for them.

Share with your spouse what you’ve learned from the experience, what you now know about yourself and understand about your spouse.

Ask them to give you the same feedback.

The more you can really gain insight to what took place, the less likely you are to repeat the fight.