Bantering or poking fun light-heartedly can be healthy for a relationship. Especially when it’s done in limits. And both are OK with it.

 Put yourself in your spouse’s place as you think about your bantering. Most important is how the one on the receiving end feels about what was said. While they may like this joking around, some topics may be too sensitive.

 Understand your bantering. Sometimes, we may joke or banter as an indirect way to communicate anger or disappointment – in a way to mention it, but not directly. Saying it in these sideways swipes is unlikely to resolve the issue and will probably negatively impact the relationship. Talk it out directly.

 Make sure that bantering is not the only way you relate to your spouse. While it is all in good fun, there is a slight negative vibe. Relationships need lots more positivity than negatives (5:1 or some believe even 20:1).

If some topics of banter hit you in way that is uncomfortable, talk about it. “We can joke about my driving, but not about my parenting.”