There are those decisions we made, the choices we took, and things we did or didn’t do that got us to where we are today. Sometimes, there are some regrets.

 Regret is different from disappointment. With disappointment, there is no agency, you feel that you can’t do anything. On the other hand, regret can propel us forward.

It’s not the regret that is bad, it’s the amount of time we spend ruminating over them. Wallowing in regrets is unproductive, and can be destructive.

Working with your regrets:

 Don’t bombard yourself with all your regrets. Address one at a time.

 Start with self-compassion; you are human. Zoom out and look at the situation as an outside observer, and address as you would for a friend.

 The key is to learn from your past. Analyze and strategize what you can do differently in the future based on your experience. Maybe it is to be bolder. To have more patience. To do due diligence. To have the conversation even it is difficult. To speak to an advisor before making big decisions.

 If you can still undo it, then do that. Apologize. Make amends. Reach out. If it a closed-door situation and there is no opportunity to undo it, then don’t beat yourself up. If it can’t be changed, maybe it’s time to loosen your grip on it.

Yes, regret makes us feel worse, but it can make us do better. It’s the discomfort that can propel us to learn from the situation.