A time-out is a “pause in the action” for the purpose of stepping back, looking at the situation more objectively, planning a strategy and asking for help. Then, once you exercise your time-out, you are able to bring your most calm, productive and patient self to the problem.

The time-out can be just a few minutes, but also can be a few days.  During that time, get yourself to a more calm state (in your favorite way – exercise, breathing, journaling, talking it out, mindfulness exercises, etc.) Don’t get caught up in doing things that sustain or increase your anger or frustration, such as going over the situation in your mind or thinking about who said what and how it made you feel.

Often it is very helpful to reach out to someone to help you see the situation with fresh eyes and help you better frame the situation more objectively.

(Time-outs are not escapes. Make sure you always return to the situation so that it can be addressed calmly and effectively.)