The key to feeling good is to decide to stop feeling bad. Not easy, but that simple. It’s a decision you can make.

Things happen in our lives. It may seem that those circumstances inform our emotions. Really, those circumstances are neutral. They exist outside us; they do not define who we are and how we feel.

 We choose how we are going to think and feel about circumstances in our lives. Admittedly, some circumstances can make us feel more comfortable, but true happiness isn’t dependent on our situation.

 We can choose to not feel bad. We can choose how we will frame the situation. We can choose to seek out the good or the opportunity in every situation.

 We can choose to accept what was, or is. And live from a more positive mindset. From that place, our lives really do become better.

(This is not about not allowing negative emotions ever. There definitely are times when we should lean into our grief, distress and sadness. This is more about those of us who tend to ruminate in the feeling bad for ourselves with self-pity.)