When you’re hoping for a change, shift your focus from the present to the future. Don’t get stuck on the present by asking yourself questions like “Why is this happening?” or “How did I get here?” What we focus on gets amplified. If you focus on the negative, the problems, or the mistakes, those will only grow larger in your mind.

Instead, ask “What do I want?” and “What do I have to do to get it?” It’s important to frame your desires as what you do want rather than what you don’t because if you’re not clear on what you want, it’s difficult to know how to work toward it.

Our brains are wired to seek answers to the questions we ask. So, when working toward change, ask yourself good questions rather than trying to think in general terms. To further solidify an idea, you might ask yourself “Why is this a good step to take at this time?” and “What will success look like, and how will I recognize it?”