OK, fight is not the best word, but somehow that is what many people feel they are doing when there is a difference of perspective or when they are disappointed in what the other has (or has not) done.

A better way of looking at such a situation (and it is inevitable that this will happen – several times) is looking for mutual resolutions.

In a healthy relationship, a ‘fight’ means there is real effort on both sides to see the other person’s point of view, understand each other’s feelings, and work towards a mutually respectful resolution.

In an unhealthy relationship, a fight is a power play and an opportunity for payback.

Additionally, communicating your concerns and needs lovingly, allowing yourself to be vulnerable, and finding resolutions are powerful tools to build intimacy, connection, and trust.