3 Conversations you might have this week What is the difference between dreams and wishes? What are some dreams/wishes that you have? What are some favorite childhood memories of summer? How might we recreate those now as adults (yes, it’s OK for adults to be playful and childlike sometimes) and/or for our children? What is […]
Month: May 2020
Share in your spouse’s good news
Show your enthusiasm when your spouse shares good news, such as accomplishment. There are four common ways of responding to news. It all starts with a mindset: – An active-constructive response (enthusiastic support): “That’s great! I knew you could do it. You’ve been working so hard.” – A passive-constructive response (understated support): a warm smile […]
You never know – until you ask
Ask. You might just get a ‘yes’. If you get a ‘no’, you are not any worse off for the asking. Your asking may open a dialogue that can be helpful in the future. Or you may be offered a different idea to the question. Actually, asking is a sign of strength. You care enough […]
Adai Ad’s Weekly 3-2-1 [05/24/2020]
3 Conversations you might have this week What does humility mean? How is it different and the same as meekness, timidity, vulnerable, open-minded, arrogance, pride? What are benefits of humility? What might it have been like to go up to the Beis Hamikdash for Shavuos? What do you imagine the celebrations to be like? What […]
Helping Someone with Shalom Bayis. Some Dos and Don’ts
Helping someone work through marriage issues is a huge responsibility. The number one rule in medicine “Do No Harm” is definitely apropos here. You certainly do not want to make a difficult situation even more complex. The questions you ask, the perspectives you share, the words you use; these all matter – are you helping or are you chas v’shalom making things even worse?
How to share your need for your personal time and space
Life is stressful. So much going on. Everyone needs a little time and space to recharge physically, emotionally, spiritually, and mentally. It’s the whole “adjust your oxygen mask first before assisting another” principle. But sometimes it can be challenging to communicate our personal needs to our partner; it is not fair to assume that your […]
Mind your own business. Only your business.
There are only three kinds of business: your own business, someone else’s business and Hashem’s business. Stress arises when we get into someone else’s or Hashem’s business. You can’t control an earthquake or a virus. Similarly, you can’t control someone else’s words or actions. It is not that you can’t be concerned or disappointed about […]
Time urgency: Do you really need to know right now?
Your brain tells you that you need to know right now. You can’t stand waiting. You can’t stand uncertainty. That’s called ‘time urgency’. Not knowing right now doesn’t have to mean not living right now. Rather, put the time urgency into perspective by asking yourself questions such as these: 1. What is the disadvantage of […]
It’s the fear that paralyzes you, not the actual situation.
“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself” – FDR Fear is the real enemy because it leads to paralysis. The key or next steps are there, but you might be too paralyzed to see it. “Courage is the willingness to act in spite of fear.” Courage, actually acting, is something in your […]
It’s not black or white: it’s not “either/or” but “both/and”
We may be used to thinking in either/or (either this is true or that is true), but life is much more complex. Sometimes, both can really be true, even if they seem contradictory. You might see these dichotomies as ‘dual-emmas’ (play on the word ‘dilemma’). When we think in either/or when the situation is more […]