We live the lives we’re willing to tolerate. (NOTE: this is not at all saying that we are responsible for everything that happens to us, such as abuse.) If we are willing to tolerate negative or unsatisfying circumstances, we may find ourselves living a life that is less fulfilling or enjoyable. So many of us […]
We live the lives we are willing to tolerate. Read More »
It’s inevitable. There will be some areas where the two of you will never agree. These are likely based on either fundamental differences in your personalities, or fundamental differences in your lifestyle needs. It’s how you see the world. These are problems that you will return to again and again. They will never be solved.
Every marriage has its perpetual problems. Read More »
Live life. Experience the joy that life is. Celebrate the small moments in life. Celebrate achievements.Join in the celebration of others.Get involved in the community.Or a hobby.Or a great conversation over coffee.Go on a date with your spouse.Try new things.Do things that are interesting and important to you. Often.—Pull yourself out of the daily grind.
Don’t only do life, live life. Read More »
Naysaying is devaluing or rejecting a suggestion without evaluating it fairly. “Nice try, nice idea but it’s never going to work.” “No way.” “Here we go again.” Sometimes it is more subtle and can be innocent questions, reminders of unforeseen impediments, and doubts. Naysaying holds back positive changes. And, it negatively impacts relationships. Nobody likes
Is naysaying slowing you down? Read More »
Honestly, do you like everyone? Then why are you worried about everyone liking you? It’s not possible that everyone will like you. There’s nothing wrong with you just because someone doesn’t like you. Trying to make everyone happy is impossible. What is most important is if you like yourself. Focus your energy there, and never
Not everyone will like you and that’s OK. Read More »
There is so much power in Shared Thinking. 1. Faster. You can come to powerful ideas faster together. Each of you can take a part to work through. 2. More Innovative. Each of you have unique experiences and perspectives that you bring to the issue. Your results will be richer than if you go at
The idea is not to think alike, but to think together. Read More »
First, there is the event that happened (or something you are thinking will happen) which then triggers some thoughts which then feed your consequent behavior.It’s ABC. A. There is the ACTIVITATING EVENTB. which activates your BELIEFS AND EMOTIONS about the eventC. which then activates some CONSEQUENCE such as your feelings and/or consequent behaviors. For example,Your
Why do you react the way you do? Read More »
Every time you use an excuse, you’re holding yourself back from getting what you really want out of life. The more you use excuses, the harder it will be to get things done. No matter how difficult they might seem at the moment, some things need to be done before it’s too late. First step
Are your excuses getting in the way of your best life? Read More »
Reframe how you deal with stress. Observe your stress – without judgment. Instead of saying, “I am so stressed!”, say, “I am noticing that I am feeling overwhelmed.” This tiny mindshift puts a little bit of distance between you and the feeling. It loosens the grip of stress and then you can better handle the situation.
Distance yourself from your stress. Read More »
No one person can meet another person’s every need. Don’t put that expectation on yourself. Or on your spouse. That is too much pressure on each of you and the relationship. Allow your spouse to have other people in their lives. Encourage them to have friendships, get advice from others, spend time with family too.
Your spouse can’t be your everything. Read More »
