When trying to address a sensitive topic or give feedback, our words matter. To reduce the likelihood of triggering a defensive response, try these strategies: By being mindful of how you word things, you can foster a more open, less defensive conversation, creating space for collaboration rather than conflict.
How to Minimize Defensive Responses from Others Read More »
Marriage partnership is about mutual empowerment—both partners working together toward the same goal, collaborating, and lifting each other up. In a true partnership, when one person experiences growth or success, the entire relationship thrives, creating a continuous cycle of shared strength and support. A healthy partnership has fluid roles of giving and receiving. Sometimes we
What is partnership in marriage? Read More »
Do it now, and you’ve won. The secret to overcoming procrastination is simple—taking action in the moment. The word “now” holds the key to “won,” because the victory lies in the decision to begin. It’s often the first few seconds of actually starting that are the hardest. The key is to do something small—sometimes even
Do it now, and you’ve won. Read More »
🥺“Some topics are hard—hard to hear, hard to say. But when we don’t have those tough conversations, I feel the silence turning into a wedge. The unspoken words don’t disappear—they linger, creating distance and tension. And avoiding the topic doesn’t solve anything; it just makes the issue harder to bring up later. I don’t want
“I wish we could talk about the hard things too” Read More »
This phrase is great when you want to offer a different nuance or perspective without dismissing what the other person just shared. It’s an invitation to introduce your viewpoint while being considerate of their feelings and perspective, without minimizing their experience. By asking permission, you show respect for their input and create space for a
Words to Use: “Can I share another version of that?” Read More »
Paying attention to changes in your spouse’s behavior and demeanor can reveal unspoken emotions and needs. Is she getting quieter? More anxious? Asking for extra support more often? Withdrawing? Becoming quicker to frustration? There could be many reasons for these changes—whether or not they’re directly related to you. Still, if you’re noticing these shifts in
Read the signals: What your spouse’s reactions might be telling you Read More »
Or similar: “What I’ve learned [that this topic is important to you].” Responding in this way allows you to validate your spouse’s feelings or concerns. It demonstrates that you’re processing what they’ve shared and giving it the weight it deserves. Even if you’re triggered by the conversation, focusing on the value of the information helps
“This is helpful to know.” Read More »
People are social beings, wired to seek connection, especially during stressful or emotional moments. Co-regulation is all about leaning on each other to stay calm and balanced when things get tough. Some people may feel like they need to handle everything themselves, but the truth is, we all need help sometimes. Sometimes, we just need
Asking for your spouse’s support: it’s not weakness, it’s co-regulation Read More »
Or similar: “I agree we should talk about this.” When something triggers you, a calm and affirming response like these can help create space for a constructive conversation. First, you are acknowledging that the topic is worth discussing. You are showing your spouse that you’re listening and open to understanding their perspective, even if it
Words to Use: “I agree that this is worth discussing.” Read More »
It’s normal to want to defend yourself or “set things straight.” We all feel the need to protect our ideas, our ego, or our version of the story. But often, that instinct can escalate tension and create unnecessary friction. By choosing not to respond, you’re not giving up your voice or agreeing with something you
Overcome the urge to defend yourself. Pause and choose peace. Read More »
