Before Rosh Hashanah, many send greetings, show appreciation, and ask for forgiveness. You may expect or hope for this from those you’ve helped or who may have hurt you. But sometimes, those messages don’t come, or they aren’t quite what you hoped for. Just let it go—don’t stress over it. Try to understand. Some people […]
Month: September 2024
Brutal honesty is usually more brutal than honest.
Sometimes, it may seem like people can’t handle “brutal honesty,” and it can be tempting to think, “It’s not my problem if they don’t want to hear the truth.” However, true honesty isn’t just about laying down the facts; it’s also about how you communicate them. When aiming for honest communication, focus on both what […]
Share opinions as opinions, not facts.
Just because you feel very strongly about your opinions doesn’t make them facts. When discussing your views, present them as opinions, not as indisputable facts. All too often, we might present our perspectives as facts. To avoid this, try framing your opinions more openly: This approach acknowledges that opinions are flexible and personal, while facts are […]
Use gentle reminders to navigate bad patterns together.
So you’ve noticed together that you have a harmful pattern such as interrupting each other during conversations. You’ve spoken about it and want to work on it. Agree on a way to gently remind each other when you slip back into it. For example, you might use a specific phrase or signal like, “Let’s remember […]
It may be hard to apologize, apologize anyway.
It may be hard to swallow your pride and apologize, but it’s also hard to live in a disconnected relationship. Choose your hard. Choosing to work through the discomfort of apologizing is the right way to respond when you’ve wronged someone.– For you, it’s an opportunity for personal growth and integrity.– For your spouse, it […]
Embrace feedback for a stronger relationship.
It can be tough to hear your spouse bring up things they wish you’d do differently. If you avoid these conversations or get defensive, you miss out on chances to grow as a person and as a couple. This can really strain your relationship. Instead, try to be open to what your spouse is saying. […]
Time to get practical: What you and your spouse need to discuss for Tishrei
As we prepare for the upcoming Tishrei holidays, it’s important to focus not only on the spiritual aspects like Tehillim, added prayers, and Teshuva, but also on the practical side of things. Tishrei brings with it meals, guests, budgets, and hosting responsibilities, all of which require careful thought and planning. Balancing both the spiritual and […]
Want change in your life? Questions to ask yourself.
When you’re hoping for a change, shift your focus from the present to the future. Don’t get stuck on the present by asking yourself questions like “Why is this happening?” or “How did I get here?” What we focus on gets amplified. If you focus on the negative, the problems, or the mistakes, those will […]
Stop hiding what bothers you.
Keeping what bothers you inside can have negative effects on your relationship. Here’s why it’s important to address your concerns openly: When you do share, express your frustrations with respect using “I” statements, such as “I feel upset when…” or “I need support with…” This approach helps avoid blame and focuses on your feelings and […]