You are each unique and wonderful in your own ways. Don’t make it into a competition. You may prioritize being healthy, and your spouse doesn’t care as much. You may want to be involved in community work and your spouse would rather spend more time with the family. You may have certain ways of doing […]
Don’t compare your spouse to yourself. Read More »
Imagine a world where we don’t have to fully believe in ourselves before we were willing to try something. We can really do this if we live with a mindset of “Experiments never fail.” We would just do it, knowing that the first time(s) will most likely be awkward and maybe even difficult. That there
Experiments never fail. Read More »
The key to feeling good is to decide to stop feeling bad. Not easy, but that simple. It’s a decision you can make. Things happen in our lives. It may seem that those circumstances inform our emotions. Really, those circumstances are neutral. They exist outside us; they do not define who we are and how
The key to feeling good is to decide to stop feeling bad. Read More »
In every couple, there are two unique people, so it is inevitable that there will have differences in perspectives, opinions, dreams, and desires. There really isn’t one right way to experience the world. Things that irritate us about our spouse are things where we have differences. Explore deeper to understand what difference(s) that irritation reveals.
There will be differences between spouses. In every marriage. Read More »
Everyone will experience changes in their lives. People move, change jobs, lose friendships. Sometimes, it can feel hard to let go of what was. We might try to get it back or recreate it. But it’s just not the same as it was. Everything that occurs in our lives happens for us – for a
“Be grateful and release” to move on. Read More »
When we vent, some of our negative emotions does add to the other person’s mental burden. So, before you dump, ask if they are in the right headspace for your venting. Give them the option to say that they are not able to listen just now. “Do you have a few minutes to help me
Ask permission before you vent. Read More »
Words are powerful; they can help, heal, hurt, harm. Words like “You make me feel special” or “What can I do to help?” can enrich a relationship. Of course, words said deliberately to hurt or belittle are damaging to a relationship. Certain words or phrases can be ‘triggering’ (for both good or bad) as they
Can you list your spouse’s trigger words? Read More »
As you create your schedule, don’t forget to put in some time for friends. Not necessarily every week, but often enough. In a healthy balance of friends and your own couple friendship. We all benefit from friendships. There are things that men feel comfortable sharing and doing only with other men. The same holds true
Make time for friends Read More »
Bantering or poking fun light-heartedly can be healthy for a relationship. Especially when it’s done in limits. And both are OK with it. Put yourself in your spouse’s place as you think about your bantering. Most important is how the one on the receiving end feels about what was said. While they may like this
Put yourself in your partner’s shoes when you banter. Read More »
If your partner is upset or quiet or down, don’t assume you know why. So often, assumptions are based on your own perspectives, not facts.If you’re upset or quiet or down, don’t assume your spouse knows why. No matter how connected you both may be, you’re not mind-readers.As soon as you assume that you understand
Assuming can damage a relationship. Read More »
