Suppressing or withholding what is on your mind is counter to intimacy. It may be hard or uncomfortable to talk about it, but you probably should. If you say it with respect and tact, your spouse can probably handle the truth. If suppressing has become a pattern in your relationship, you can – and ought […]
Yes, I can handle the truth. Read More »
Don’t ever assume you know a person or a situation completely. There’s always something new to learn. You might start the conversation with “I’m confused about something, and I’m wondering if you can help me understand it better.” And then listen with genuine curiosity.
Words to use: “I am confused about…” Read More »
Being on the receiving end of a compliment can feel downright uncomfortable for many. So, we might reject it, dismiss it, deny it, downplay it, change the subject altogether, or simply shut it down. But that discounts the giver of the compliment. Saying “thank you” to a compliment doesn’t just acknowledge their kindness, thoughtfulness, effort,
How to respond to compliments. Read More »
When someone is angry, frustrated or worried, your instinctual and intuitive reaction may be to try to calm them down, urge them to cool off, suggest it’s not worth getting so upset about. And sometimes that may work. It is even better to allow them to vent and get it all out. When someone is
How to respond when someone vents to you. Read More »
3 Conversations you might have this week What’s the most controversial opinion you have? What’s the weirdest thing you loved as a child? What is the stupidest joke you’ve ever heard? 2 Quotes to inspire you “Friendship isn’t a big thing – it is a million little things.” “Whoever is happy will make others happy
Adai Ad’s Weekly 3-2-1 [1/16/2022] Read More »
Sometimes, your spouse just needs to unwind alone – in the comfort and quiet of their own space, on their own terms. It doesn’t necessarily say anything about the relationship. Plan to leave the house. Go out with friends. Do your errands. Take an exercise walk. Take the kids out for a few hours. Give
Leave the house to your spouse to be alone. Read More »
Before you argue with someone, ask yourself if that person is ready to hear a different perspective. If not, there really is no point in having a discussion. Actually, first, ask yourself why you want to have that conversation. Do you want to change their mind? Do you want them to do something differently? Are
The golden rule of argument. Read More »
Everyone needs some time to have their own fun – with friends, family or hobbies. Allow – no encourage – your spouse to have their own time. Saying things like, “Have a really good time,” “Have fun with your friends!” or, “Hope your night is awesome; I can’t wait to hear about it!” shows that
Words to use: “Have fun!” Read More »
Of course, emergencies come up all the time. This is not about those. This is about the times when people put you on the spot with what they deem urgent matters and want your time or assistance. Some examples: The person who didn’t do their part before a deadline. The kid who forgot about buying
Someone else’s urgency doesn’t have to be your emergency. Read More »
If you like something, but your spouse doesn’t, you could do what they like too. Just for them. With a smile. For example, you love cauliflower rice and your spouse prefers white rice, you could make both. You don’t have to get them to like cauliflower rice. And you don’t have to forgo it either.
Make loving exceptions for your spouse. Read More »
