Every relationship has issues where each sees things somewhat differently. (Money, in laws, children, religiosity, value differences, division of responsibilities, etc.) Too often, these issues only get attention when couples are fighting about them. When an issue is not addressed in constructive ways, negative energy around the issue is stored up and can easily get […]
Talk about the issue before you are triggered. Read More »
People will respect you and your ‘yes’ when you don’t give a ‘yes’ so freely. Each day will present you with tons of opportunities, but you must say ‘No’ to most of them to use your time effectively and live a more balanced life. Once you start saying ‘No’ to things that may be wonderful
Don’t always say “Yes”. Read More »
We design 90% of our life through the choices and tradeoffs we make. It is the word, “tradeoff”, that is so empowering. Essentially, we are in control by trading one thing for another thing. If we do not like where our lives are headed, we need to consider what are we willing to trade to
Life is a series of choices and tradeoffs. Read More »
Advice is someone telling you what to do. Many times, when we are facing a challenge, we just want someone to tell us what to do. It is so much easier and it takes away our burden. You may be needing an answer, but is someone else’s advice best? Are you asking the right person?
Don’t seek advice, seek insight. Read More »
When we see that someone is facing a challenge or struggling with something (big or small), we typically might ask them, “What is the matter?” or some variation. For even more meaningful and potentially helpful conversation, we should also ask: “What matters to you?” This concept comes from the healthcare field. Practitioners are now asking
Ask: “What matters to you?” Read More »
By definition, a transition is a process or a period of changing from one state or condition to another. In addition to the many details that usually accompany a transition (so many decisions, logistics, learning new things, etc.), transitions are also emotionally challenging. We might feel nervous, anxious, unsure, or sad. We might be feeling lost and
Managing life’s tough transitions. Read More »
There’s the old cliché, “The grass is greener on the other side of the fence” that tells us not to compare. The reality is that the grass is greener over there because they put in the work to keep it that way. Watering, fertilizing, mowing. Whatever it takes for a great lawn. Too often, we
The grass is greener – where you water it. Read More »
There are three types of scenarios that would require someone to respond either patiently or impatiently. Reflect on how you show up in these different areas. Interpersonal: Patience with other people, their demands and their failings. Patience and understanding toward others is essential when you’re working with people – friends, family, colleagues, vendors, strangers. Life
3 types of patience needed in life. Read More »
Living with clutter can be adding to your stress. It is worthwhile to go through your stuff and purge. For some people, this is not so easy. There are all sorts of reasons why we hold onto things. Most are emotional reasons. For the memories. Because we think we may need them in the future.
Decluttering without emotion. Read More »
A time-out is a “pause in the action” for the purpose of stepping back, looking at the situation more objectively, planning a strategy and asking for help. Then, once you exercise your time-out, you are able to bring your most calm, productive and patient self to the problem. The time-out can be just a few
