Admitting a wrong-doing generally isn’t easy — especially when doing so means acknowledging that you hurt someone you care about. When an apology is absent or it’s a bad apology, it puts a crack in the very foundation of a relationship. You have to mean it. It must be genuine. An insincere apology is worse […]
How to apologize the right way. Read More »
In life, lots of things go differently than we had expected or hoped. There will be unexpected events, expenses, and situations. It’s important for partners to understand and anticipate that as part of life. And since we can’t really anticipate anything, we must therefore react with flexibility. If we are too rigid and we resist
Flexibility keeps stress levels down. Read More »
Use gratitude to counter stress and uncertainty. When we take time to focus on what we are grateful for, we are choosing positive emotions over negative. When we express gratitude, our brain releases dopamine and serotonin — two hormones that make us feel lighter and happier inside. Gratitude grounds us and is a great way to
Gratitude counters stress. Read More »
“The key is not to prioritize your schedule, but to schedule your priorities.” – Stephen Covey What do you care about most in your life? Whatever it may be, make sure you are making it a priority. (You could say everything is a priority. But, if that were the case, nothing would be a priority.)
Schedule your priorities. Read More »
Being honest is being real. Appearing to be perfect is an illusion. And erodes trust and connection.If you want to be a more honest person, the first step is to be you. With all your humanness, all your strengths and limitations. With all your imperfections. One of the reasons why people are dishonest is because
Don’t try to be perfect. Just be honest. Read More »
They have opened up to you because they trust you to keep what you’ve been told confidential. They shared a personal part of themselves that they don’t want others to know (that’s the definition of ‘secret’). It is their information and they should be the only one sharing it. Trust is easy to lose and
Keep your spouse’s secrets secret. Usually. Read More »
Remembering the good times (dating, wedding, first apartment, silly things you did, crazy adventures, achievements) creates happy feelings. As you reminisce, some of those old feelings come creeping back. Reminding yourselves of your solid history together is a great way to increase your bond. ‘Remember when…’ is a great beginning to a loving conversation. Break
Reminisce about the good times. Often. Read More »
Misunderstandings, hurt feelings, anger, frustration, sadness….so many of these negative emotions all stem from the fact that two people don’t talk to each other about things. By not talking it through, you aren’t giving the other person a chance to share what is going on for them, what support they need, their fears, their intentions.
When we blame others, we may experience a brief instant of relief. It feels better to no longer be in the crosshairs, the target of criticism, punishment, or harm. And it can help us avoid questioning our own self-worth and worthiness. In the short term. But then, come feelings of guilt and regret and possibly
If you blame other people for your mistakes, you give away your chances to learn. Read More »
“Assuming” is accepting something as true – without proof. It is deciding a thought you are having is a fact – when you don’t have all the information. Assumptions can be quite detrimental – especially when you make choices and decisions based on little more than a good (or not so good) guess. Too often,
Assumptions often lead to poor decisions. Read More »
