You can’t GET anyone to do anything. Well, you can – if you manipulate, control, bully; none are good for a marriage. You can only control yourself. So if you want a different dynamic in your relationship, only look at the area that you can control – yourself. You can’t get someone to listen to […]
How can you get your spouse to listen more? You just can’t. Read More »
To be clear, it is interdependence, not co-dependence. Before marriage, your actions and decisions mostly impacted just yourself. Your own bank account, your own reputation, your own credit score, your own time, your own living style. As soon as you got married, that all changed. You are part of a WE or an US. What
In marriage you shift independence to interdependence. Read More »
No rights. Just responsibilities or obligations to each other. The obligation to respect and care for each other – physically and emotionally. When each of the couple cares for and respects each other, then the issue of rights falls moot. Both are quite happy in the relationship. Don’t look to see that your rights are
To be clear, a WE mentality does not mean that you get to know everything about your spouse. There are many things that can remain private. –Private, not secret.– Conversations between friends, emails, mistakes, past history, what each did during the day. When there is trust, neither feels the need to know. A WE mentality
Privacy and a ‘we’ mentality. There can/ ought to be both. Read More »
We have become the ‘me’ generation. And with that, a lot of self help and self reflection. There is a place for all that. We can only change ourselves, we need to know ourselves so we can recognize our role in our life’s situation. and all that. All very very important. At the same time,
Not self-reflection, rather us-reflection Read More »
Some people avoid self-reflection because they fear that they will be faced with the less pretty sides of themselves. Not so, we all have lots of successes to celebrate too. Start with those. Success breeds success. (You can always go to the mistakes questions later.) • What went well? What am I most proud of?
Self reflection: learning from your successes Read More »
It takes time to define your core values and life purpose. But it is key to making good choices for your life. How can you forge a path when you don’t know where you are going? So, once you have defined your values, life’s purpose and priorities, turn them into a set of guiding questions
Reality check: are you living according to your values? Read More »
