Practice seeing life with a beginner’s mind; see things with an open mind and fresh eyes – just like a beginner. With curiosity. With openness to new possibilities. That means dropping prejudgments, expectations, and preconceived ideas. That is letting go of what you think you know about the subject. It’s about being curious and wondering, […]
See life with beginner’s mind, with curiosity. Read More »
Vorfreude. This German word conveys the concept of joyful anticipation which comes from imagining future pleasures. (Vorfreude literally translates to “advance-joy.”) Vorfreude can be a sliver of excitement in middle of the busyness of life. Think and talk about an upcoming special event – a yom tov, a date-night, a vacation, a party, a move,
Vorfreude: awaiting joy is itself a joy. Read More »
Something important to talk about? Something that is uncomfortable for one or both of you? Give the conversation its best chance – by being at your best. Don’t have the conversation when you are hungry, angry, late or tired (think the acronym H.A.L.T.) You won’t have a productive conversation when you don’t have enough energy,
Have hard conversations when you’re at your best, not your worst. Read More »
We all have blind spots — aspects of our personalities that we don’t know exist. And they affect our performance, our success and our relationships. But since we don’t know them, we can’t work on them. Proactively ask your spouse to point them out. Maybe ask for just one at a time. “What is one
Ask for help to recognize, and work on, your blind spots. Read More »
“Just have one good day. Then repeat.” – James Clear Stuff happens. Life can be stressful. Move forward. Slowly, but consistently. From strength to strength.
Just have one good day. Then repeat. Read More »
So much of conflict stems from a lack of clarity. Too often, we jump to conclusions about the other person’s intent – usually to the negative. Instead, pause and ask for clarity. “I’d like to check in and clear something up together.” This might be somewhat uncomfortable (at first), but avoiding the question brings lots
Clarity is Kindness Read More »
Asking questions is a smart practice. It helps you gain the insights and information that you need to act according to the real facts, rather than from assumptions. Sometimes, it may take some humility to ask. But, don’t let pride get in the way of doing what needs to be done so that you make
Instead of assuming, ask a question. Read More »
Your spouse isn’t a mind reader. If you need support, you need to ask for it. If you know what type of support you need, ask for it directly and clearly. It isn’t helpful to hint or wish. Your spouse wants to support you; they just need to know what kind of support you are
If you’re going to get yourself a drink or snack, do it for two – get your spouse a drink too, or ask them if they’d like a drink. Getting a sweater – get your spouse one too. Whoever brushes their teeth first puts toothpaste on both of your toothbrushes (just an idea). These little
For most couples, there’s the morning “goodbye” as you go on to your day and the “hello” after the day. Make those meaningful. As possible, actually say “good bye” to each other face to face. Add your own flair – a wink, smile, a quick note. Of course, you can add something special from time
Have a special ritual for your daily “goodbyes” and “hellos”. Read More »
