communication

Of course, simply, you can’t hear someone else if you are talking. More than that, the quieter the noise – the busyness, franticness – the more you are able to hear and learn and appreciate the world and people around you. In the silent moments of your life – when you are not inundated with […]

Whoever expresses their emotions first – whether through words or body language – gets to share their feelings completely before the other can speak. It may not be easy, but it is important to allow the speaker to share it all. This shows respect to the speaker. Even if your spouse is sharing complaints about

The words we think in shape our emotions and thus our frame of mind. (And, it also impacts how you are perceived by others.) Think about the difference between feeling ‘overwhelmed” and feeling that you are “in demand”. Some others: “I choose to do this.” rather than “I have to do this.” “I get to

Also don’t say: “Don’t be so sensitive.” “You’re overreacting.” One of the worst things you can do is to tell someone how to feel. Telling someone to calm down is like saying that their emotional response to a situation is somehow wrong or invalid. They have the right to feel – and express – any

“You were supposed to mail that package last week. Now it’s going to be late.” Bringing up a mistake just for your own satisfaction of hearing them admit they were wrong doesn’t resolve the situation. Blaming, complaining or nagging causes the other person to feel like a failure. No wonder that they defend themselves. They

Everyone lives by a set of ‘unspoken rules’ – rules that are rarely articulated. Each of you have your own ideas about what is acceptable and it probably doesn’t even occur to you that you would have different expectations in that area. Too often, we don’t articulate the rules until they are broken; actually, that

If you are unsure about something, just ask: “What do you mean by that?” Then check back to see if you really got what the other person meant. Allow the other to clarify. “So what I understand is …. Did I get that right?” NOTE: There is a huge difference between “So what you are

When someone hears, “What do you have planned for tomorrow?” they are probably thinking “what is it that you are really asking?” Eventually you are going to come out with the real question, you may as well get to it from the very beginning, and avoid the ambiguity and discomfort. –>”I’m thinking that tomorrow, I’d