One powerful way to strengthen your marriage is to deliberately call to mind the highlights of your life together. It’s amazing what reminiscing does for a relationship when you talk about special moments, revisit special places, watch home videos, look at old pictures or listen to special songs.
Have a “Remember When” moment Read More »
As you plan your days and weeks, plan for some downtime, for some play. Whatever play means to you; something you enjoy doing. Not every minute has to be filled with work and housework and chores and errands. Do things that are fun for you. Gardening, reading a book (OK, an article), crossword puzzles, slow
What is it that makes your spouse smile? What can help him/her get out of a bad mood? What can energize him/her? Ask directly. “What can I do to help you when you are feeling like this?” (When your spouse asks you this question, answer truthfully and fully. Your spouse really does want to be
Know what makes your spouse smile Read More »
Spouses generally like to give to the other. In the giving, they build their love. Giving and receiving are two sides of the same coin of intimacy. Receive what is given – with grace and the same compassion and love in which it was given. Letting ourselves receive deeply and graciously is a gift to
Receive well and you’ll get more Read More »
It’s the small things that count. Lots of small little things. Things that the other may not even know you did. Like not eating the last piece of cake just so your spouse could have it. Like not bothering him/her when s/he is reading. Like bringing him/her a cup of cold water – without being
Love is built from many small things Read More »
Schedule a date night or day often. Put it on your calendar. Keep that time sacred. While it is worthwhile to set aside a budget for special times, it doesn’t always have to cost money. A nice walk on the beach. A drive to nowhere. Walk through a new neighborhood. Stay home and play a
Make time together a priority Read More »
Good feelings generate more good feelings –at least most of the time. It is vitally important for good momentum to continuously build in your relationship. Even after a major conflict. Or perhaps, especially then. The absolutely wrong time to act on anger and resentment of the conflict is when you are presented with an opportunity
Good feelings generate more good feelings Read More »
Love is not just an emotion. It is also a decision. If you marry someone, this person becomes your top priority. Just making them happy, being generous and caring should be an automatic, almost contractual obligation. Just as most consider fidelity to be a non-negotiable responsibility in a marriage, consider being kind, forgiving and generous
Love is a decision Read More »
When your spouse makes the effort to do or say something for your enjoyment or to ease your day, show your appreciation. Say ‘thank you!’ and definitely do not dismiss it, joke or divert attention. — Your spouse wants to give to you; s/he feels more connected when s/he gives AND the giving was well
Receive compliments, help, gifts, apologies graciously Read More »
Compliments, appreciation, awe, approval, encouragement, pride, acknowledgements. Why you would want to share your positive feelings. 1. Your spouse will want to spend time with you (not from a place of neediness). A person naturally seeks the company of those who think well of them. – The more someone senses appreciation from another, the closer
Express your positive feelings of your spouse. Often. Read More »
