Sharing/ Disclosing about your ‘stuff’ Everyone has ‘stuff’. True, some is more heavy than others. There is an adage, “You’re only as sick as your secrets.” Revealing information that may ruin a shidduch is understandably very difficult, but keeping it secret creates a constant anxiety and a barrier to mutual trust and sincere communication. Marriages have […]
How to share difficult topics on a date Read More »
Dating begins as a selfish act, whereby a single person is seeking their own happiness. If it is to culminate in a lasting commitment it must result in a selfless love of another. For dating to have succeeded, we need to go from “me” to “we.” That is some journey to go on.
Some people get stuck along the way. If you find that you consistently get stuck along the way, it is worthwhile to ask yourself “Maybe it is me?” and not always assume there is something wrong with the other person.
Do you get stuck in the transition from “me” to “we”? Read More »
Topics you might talk about before Yom Tov to make sure you both are aware and on the same page. DOWNLOAD AS PDF Family minhagim/ traditions/ memories Talk about Pesach family traditions/rituals: days leading up to the Yom Tov, special foods, the first seder, the second seder, Chol Hamoed, last days of Pesach, Acharon shel
Peaceful and Joyful Pesach Read More »
With all the wonderfulness of Pesach, there is also much disruption to schedule and routine. As much as practical, try to set order. Organize your kitchen and food storage as best as possible. Unpack your suitcases. Spend an hour or so planning and you’ll save yourselves and you’ll save yourselves much time (which build up
Clear space = Clear mind and spirit Read More »
To make things simple, we divide this beahvior into three categories and reflect on each. They are: 1) selfish, 2) mildly narcissistic, 3) acutely narcissistic.
The person I am dating seems to think only about himself. Should I get out? Read More »
3 Conversations you might have this week What kind of memories do we want to make for our family this Pesach? What is a good balance between family traditions and adapting to the reality of who our family is? What is something you look forward to this Pesach? What is something you are anxious about?
Adai Ad’s Weekly 3-2-1 [03/21/2021] Read More »
The question of whether to consider dating or marrying someone who has a psychological problem is one of the most difficult relationship matters. The consequences could be enormous, and there is also a great deal of confusion and fear surrounding this issue. The purpose of this article is to offer some clarity to help you to make a thoughtful decision as to what is in your best interest.
The person has a psychological illness – should I consider it? Read More »
Where is the request to continue the dating process coming from? Has overall compatibility been established? What do they say they need clarity on?
Especially important Is to be clear between the two of you as to what kind of clarity is to be gained during the next dates.
Set a goal and a timeframe. Not an ultimatum. Don’t pressure.
Sometimes, people get stuck. It is worthwhile to get professional support in making a decision.
He says “I am not ready, let’s continue dating”. Should I agree? Read More »
Before you begin, ask yourself why you feel so upset. Think about your feelings, and what values or needs are not being addressed. Discuss one topic at a time. Don’t dump all your frustrations. No degrading language. Discuss the issue, not the person. Express your feelings with words. Use ‘I statements’. Don’t slam doors or
Fight fair & smart Read More »
