By nature, we notice what is wrong more frequently than what is right; this is called negativity bias. It takes specific intentionality to notice what did not go wrong today. In the military’s resiliency training, there is an exercise “Hunting the good stuff” with the objective of learning to recognize positive things that happen throughout […]
Hunting for the good stuff Read More »
Far too often, people who are disappointed have negative emotional reactions. They might blame themselves as they feel ashamed for not living up to their ideal self. They may also turn their anger to others who didn’t live up to their expectations. Neither are healthy. Reframe disappointments as learning experiences; this will help you cope
Disappointments can be learning experiences Read More »
Unrealized expectations lead to disappointment and frustration and ultimately resentment. The fewer unrealistic expectations you have about marriage and each other the better. Expectations in areas of how you talk to each other, treat each other, stick up for each other, spend time together, show love and respect, etc. When you don’t have a long
Expect less, get more Read More »
Some people have the tendency to say “no” automatically—even before thinking about what was really asked of them. The asker can feel like their request isn’t even given a chance, or like they don’t matter. Of course, this isn’t good for the relationship. To help with this, before responding, take a deep breath, hold it
Think before automatically saying ‘no’ Read More »
A root cause of most human stress is simply our stubbornness to hold on to ideals – as if they’re real, certain, solid, everlasting fixtures in our lives. We hold on tight to the hope that things will go exactly as we imagine, and then we complicate our lives to no end when they don’t.
Holding on? Try letting go. Read More »
Too many commitments and can’t seem to ever get out from under that all? You will have to put in some time and thought so you can find out what you can cut out so that you can get your life in balance. What are you so busy with? Write down everything on your to-do
If you can’t define what’s overwhelming you, you can’t do much about it. Read More »
Self-compassion is showing to yourself the same level of kindness, care, and support when you´re struggling or suffering that you would also show to a good friend. When we look at the way people treat themselves, we´ll notice that oftentimes, they´re much harder on themselves than on others. Three aspects of self-compassion: Mindfulness. Self-kindness. Common
Self-compassion is a supportive voice from within yourself Read More »
We all have different needs, one of the most common being space. You can both love someone and need space from them. Especially these crazy Corona days. BE APART TOGETHER. Build ‘alone time’ into your daily routine. When we are not intentional about taking space when we need it, we risk being hurt when one
You need alone time to recharge Read More »
Just because it FEELS true, doesn’t mean it IS true. Just because the thoughts are running through your mind, it does not mean they represent reality. They very well may be coming from your imagination. While often we consciously think about things, frequently thoughts just happen to us propelled by some unconscious source. These thoughts
Don’t believe everything you are thinking Read More »
Big aspirations? Be realistic, making drastic changes is not usually sustainable. Start small with one small micro-habit at a time. A micro-habit is ridiculously small, but very manageable. Want to include more exercise in your life? Start with a walk down the block. You can build up to a 3 mile run. Want to add
Want to change a behavior? Change one “micro-habit” at a time Read More »
