It really may be that your spouse has much more to learn about being in a relationship. your spouse might have had limited exposure to positive relationship role models or may have faced challenging experiences during childhood. These factors can significantly shape their understanding of being in a relationship. That might all be true. However, […]
Overcoming Relationship Challenges with Empathy Read More »
When you have something important to ask of someone, it’s essential to stick to one clear and concise point and avoid “detail overload”. Providing excessive information can overwhelm the other person, causing them to miss or misunderstand the central message. The main point may get lost in the noise, diluting the urgency of your ask.
Getting Your Message Across: Avoid Detail Overload. Read More »
In any relationship, differences of perspectives are inevitable due to each person’s unique set of values that they hold dear. For instance, one spouse may prioritize feeding the family only healthy foods for their well-being, while the other cherishes the freedom to explore diverse cuisines and savor life’s pleasures. Both values are valid and deserve
Honoring Each Other’s Values. Read More »
Find yourself fighting over the smallest things? It’s often because those little issues become an outlet for bigger frustrations or our ego takes over. But here’s the thing: it’s just not worth it. Step back, gain perspective, and ask yourself if these petty arguments will truly matter in the long run. Ask yourself, “Will this
Prioritizing peace: Saving energy for what matters. Read More »
If your partner is upset or quiet or down, don’t assume you know why. So often, assumptions are based on your own perspectives, not facts.If you’re upset or quiet or down, don’t assume your spouse knows why. No matter how connected you both may be, you’re not mind-readers.As soon as you assume that you understand
Assuming can damage a relationship. Read More »
During an argument, take a break with Yellow Light, Red Light When you notice that your discussion is spiraling downwards or moving to sensitive topics, you might use the metaphor of the traffic light to indicate that you need to take a break. The idea is to use a two-word phrase “Yellow Light” in place
How to disagree respectfully & productively. – Part 5/5 Read More »
Think of a conflict from the perspective of a neutral third party. Often, it is helpful to think of a conflict from the perspective of a neutral third party who wants the best for all involved. How might this person resolve the disagreement? This is not always so easy to do in the moment of
How to disagree respectfully & productively. – Part 4/5 Read More »
The words we use in a disagreement can make all the difference. Start with a soft opener. According to the Gottman Institute, 94% of the time, the way the conversation begins determines how it ends. In other words, discussions will end on the same note they begin. If we start an argument harshly by attacking
How to disagree respectfully & productively. – Part 3/5 Read More »
Don’t “agree to disagree”. When we “agree to disagree” we are essentially hitting a dead-end, and thus there is a sense of disconnect. Each side is holding onto their own truth without acknowledging that the other person has another interpretation of the same event. Both sides can be right. Based on their experiences and logic,
How to disagree respectfully & productively. – Part 2/5 Read More »
Be OK with disagreements. Disagreements are essentially differences of opinions, perspectives or values. And they are inevitable; we all see things differently from others from time to time. When we encounter such differences, we can use them to get to know each other better. Good, healthy disagreement leads to eye-opening discussions, growth, and potentially more
How to disagree respectfully & productively. – Part 1/5 Read More »
