This phrase helps clarify your feelings by acknowledging that your upset is tied to an unmet expectation. It invites a conversation about what you expected, helping the other person understand your perspective. It also signals a willingness to discuss and reflect on whether those expectations were realistic or not. đź’¬ “I’m upset because I expected […]
Words to Use: “I’m upset because I expected…” Read More »
This phrase can shut down a conversation before it even starts. It dismisses the importance of the topic and can make your partner feel like their concerns are invalid or unimportant. It’s a quick way to make the other person feel unheard, and that can lead to frustration and emotional distance. Instead of blocking the
Words to Avoid: “Why are we even talking about this?” Read More »
These five words can shift the whole tone of a conversation. They show self-awareness. Accountability. And a willingness to repair.They tell your partner: I see how my actions—or inactions—affected you, and I’m not going to brush it off. 💬 “That wasn’t fair of me. I can see how that landed.”💬 “You’re right—I didn’t handle that
Words to Use: “That wasn’t fair of me.” Read More »
This phrase often comes across as dismissive, passive, and reluctant. It can make the other person feel like their perspective isn’t worthy of real engagement or respect. It’s a way of brushing off their feelings or opinions without truly addressing them. Instead of shutting down the conversation with this phrase, try showing curiosity and a
Words to Avoid: “If you say so.” Read More »
Whether it’s in relationships, work, or personal growth, feedback is one of the most powerful tools we have. But only if we’re brave enough to ask for it—and open enough to hear it.Try this: Ask someone you trust:💬 “How am I doing?”💬 “Is there something I could be doing better?”💬 “Anything you wish I knew
Ask for feedback. And actually listen. Read More »
We’re two unique people—different upbringings, different wiring, different life experiences. So, of course, we’ll see things differently sometimes. You don’t need to bring the other person over to your side. First, seek to understand theirs. You might learn something new or expand your own thinking. At the very least, you’ll get to know them better.
Words to Use:  “Help me understand your perspective.” Read More »
🤔Do you really know how your spouse feels about how you show up in your marriage? Are you being an equal partner? Are you truly friends? Are you a real support? Do you talk openly about how you’re doing in the relationship — or do you avoid it because you’re afraid of hearing where you
How are you doing as a spouse? Read More »
It might technically be true — maybe what’s coming up isn’t really about you. Maybe it’s shaped by your partner’s past, a sensitive spot, or their current state of mind. But saying “That’s your issue, not mine” misses the point.It sends the message: “Whatever you’re feeling, it’s not my problem.” 🎯 Even if the origin
Words to avoid: “It’s your issue. Not mine.” Read More »
Self-sabotage doesn’t always look like dramatic failures or reckless choices. Sometimes, it’s more subtle—pulling away just when things are going well, procrastinating on something important, or convincing yourself that something won’t work out before it even has a chance. At its core, self-sabotage is often about one thing: control. Uncertainty can be uncomfortable, and when
Self-Sabotage: The illusion of control Read More »
So much of communication is about how our words are received, not just our intention.Even with the best intentions, our words don’t always land well or have the effect we hope. When our words don’t come across well, it’s important to own that, not shift the blame. It’s a way to stay present, stay open,
Words to Use: “I can see how that came across wrong.” Read More »
