Too many of us fill every empty second checking out our phones. There’s always something to read or play on the phone. But that robs us of the small opportunities to be present in our own lives, being with our own thoughts, thinking about what matters to us, making meaning of what is happening in […]
The most interesting thing you can get to know today is not on your phone. Read More »
The words with which we think can make a huge difference in how we actually live. And how people perceive us. TRY vs DO “I’m trying to get this done.” vs “I’m doing it; I’m on the journey toward making it happen” — “Trying” is a convenient way for you to never actually have to
Listen in to your emotions. They have so much to tell you. Shame. Anger. Anxiety. They all tell us something about what is going on for us. Before it turns into something even larger. Tap into the emotion: “Hey anxiety. What’s going on?” You might notice that something feels out of alignment. Your anxiety may
Listen to your emotions. Read More »
Change is hard. You don’t have to do it by leaps. Rather, make small tweaks to your life – one by one. A tweak is a fine, small adjustment. It is small, and therefore manageable. And that can have a huge impact.
It’s not a leap; it’s just a tweak. Read More »
What is it that you really want? The majority of people know exactly what they don’t want, but don’t really know what they DO want. Or, they sort of know the direction of what they want, but they haven’t clearly articulated it to themselves. And worse, they hope that their spouse or friend can figure
What do you really want? Read More »
Talk to each other. In person. Without distractions. Often.
When the wifi is down, the relationship is up. Read More »
Notice the positives in your spouse. Notice abilities, talents, efforts. Name them. State examples of where you have seen them. “You come up with such innovative solutions, like the time when …” “You make me smile when I’m feeling stressed. For example, just now when I …” These fuller statements help the other person feel
Look out for the positive. Acknowledge them. Out loud. Read More »
Sometimes, we sabotage our own happiness and that of our relationships with our own thoughts. Our minds go on and on endlessly with “Why isn’t it better”, “It shouldn’t have happened that way”, “What if …”. Judgments, expectations, worries, resentments, and stories about what should and shouldn’t happen. We don’t allow ourselves to just enjoy
Get out of your own way. Read More »
Every positive thing done in your marriage should be counted. Don’t just dismiss a positive act because “that is what spouses do for each other” or “it’s such a small thing”. Every small thing adds up to a wonderful relationships. And don’t take anything for granted. You are blessed that your spouse does ‘what they
Appreciate the small things. They add up. Read More »
If you are feeling stuck or in a conflict, ask yourself “Where am I wrong?”. You will gain so much more by asking this question than by insisting you are right, or even asking “Am I wrong?” You are essentially asking: – What information am I missing? – What might I be inferring or misunderstanding?
Ask yourself “Where am I wrong?” (as applicable). Read More »
